Adoptee Holidays

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Greetings from our home to yours.

As you venture out to experience holiday cheer, one thing we are certain of is holidays can be hard for adoptees. We can have a million reasons to be happy, yet the adoptee feelings are sometimes hard to overcome.

Of course I’m not speaking for all adoptees, but from my experience and knowing hundreds all over the world, many of us do struggle.

I guess I would describe it as a deep sadness or despair that comes more than goes during the holiday season. For a non-adoptee I would maybe explain it as a time of grief, loss and sadness. Holidays are a reminder of family and for adoptees, we have two families, our adoptive families and our biological families.  This dynamic situation that we had no control over can create an overwhelming emotional experience for the adoptee.

Many times we can feel alone and isolated in a room full of people and no one can relate or understand this. We can be triggered by photos of other peoples families, and the fact that we feel like we’re in limbo between our family situation, never really feeling like we fit in to either.

Please understand the way you are feeling is normal for a not normal situation. Many adoptees feel this way and you aren’t alone.

For me, I’ve decided that family isn’t always biological or adoptive, but it’s who we make it. I still struggle but I try my best to focus on all the things I have to be thankful for and for the relationships that I hold close to my heart who are active in my life now. Again, sometimes it’s easier said than done.

Reaching out to other adoptees in online communities and support groups is a wonderful resource to get us through the holidays. I’ve found that connecting with others who understand to be one of the most valuable resources so far. I would love to share a few recommended resources for any adoptees who might come across this blog post who are feeling particularly alone this holiday season.

By next year at this time we will have our support group up and running and have multiple meetings through out the holiday season.

Meanwhile, I’m going to set up a private chat group for Adoptees in or around the Lexington, KY area. This way we can have a safe space NOW to share and get to know one another.

Many blessings to all,

Pamela K.

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Recommended Resources:

Adoptees On – Podcast

How Does It Feel To Be Adopted?

Dear Adoption

Adoptee in Recovery

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Volunteers Needed

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Hi Everyone,

I hope you are all doing well!

As the winter season gets closer this means we’re getting closer to our launching of Adoptees Connect – Lexington, KY.

EXCITING TIMES AHEAD!

But with one little person handling all the dynamics of pulling this off I could use a little help with a few areas. I know if you don’t ask you will not receive! 🙂

If you have any availability to help me out please respond to this message by leaving your information at the bottom and  I will get right back to you.  A little help goes along way so anything you can give time wise is greatly appreciated.

Many Blessings & Love,

Pamela Karanova

 

 

Flyer for First Meeting

Hi Everyone,

I’ve created a flyer to be shared on Social Media and in our Lexington, KY communities. Please feel free to print and share with anyone you wish. Word of mouth and advertising via social media will be our main source to get the word out there regarding our group so any and all help is greatly appreciated.

Can’t wait to see you all on January 13th!

If you would like to save this you can right click and “Save” this flyer to your laptops, cell phones or tablets. You can feel free to share where you wish.

Love & Kind Regards,

Pamela K.

 

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January 13th 2018 – First Meeting

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Hi Everyone,

We’ve set a official date for our first meeting and I’m so excited to get together with my TRIBE! It’s along time coming here in the Lexington, KY area.

We’ve decided to meet at Wild Fig Coffee & Books which is a cute little coffee shop off Limestone. They serve coffee, treats and it has a home feel to it you don’t feel at most coffee shops. Not only that but they are a  private owned local coffee shop and I try to support them as much as possible.

Saturday, January 13th 2018 from 5:00P-7:00P

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Our first meeting I would really just like to introduce myself and express my reasons for starting this support group. I would like to share what has been on my heart that made me put this long time dream into action. I want to share a little of my adoption story and then I would like to make a few announcements.

This will be followed by opening up the floor to my tribe, my fellow adoptees and give them a chance to introduce themselves, and share a little about what brings them to the group.

I would then like to receive some input from my fellow adoptees about a few questions I have regarding our group guidelines. It’s important to me that everyone knows this is our group, we’re in this together and I want everyone to be as comfortable as possible. Hopefully we have enough time to do this.

I think that’s it for now.

I’m looking forward to seeing everyone!

Kind Regards,

Pamela K.

 

 

 

Adoptees Connect – Lexington, KY Mission Statement

Mission Statement

Adoptees Connect – Lexington, KY

Adoptees Connect – Lexington, KY is a peer-led adoptee centric support group for adult adoptees who reside in or around the Lexington, KY area. This group is designed to be a “safe space” for adoptees to gather and share their experiences, hard times & hopes regarding their adoption journeys. We believe being adopted can come with complexities that only another adoptee can understand and this is why adoptees connecting with one another is so critical. Our desire is to let every adoptee know they aren’t alone and the way they feel is normal for a not normal situation. Nothing is normal about being separated from your biological families at the beginning of life.

Founder: Pamela A. Karanova

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About Adoptees Connect – Lexington, KY

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Adoptees Connect – Lexington, KY is founded and facilitated by Pamela Karanova of Lexington, KY. Although Pamela is an Iowa native, she moved to Lexington, KY when she was 17 years old and considers it to be her home.

Pamela believes the complexities from being adopted are those that can only be understood by another adoptee and adoptees hold the most valuable perspective in the adoption equation.

Pamela has 3 adult children and receives more joy than anyone could imagine being the mom to these amazing individuals. She’s a full time Caregiver/Team Leader in the home health field and works PT in the hotel/hospitality industry. She loves what she does and considers herself blessed to be a blessing. She loves the simple things in life, hot tea, coffee, sunrises, sunsets, and bonfires. She loves hiking and chasing waterfalls and she finds much peace and joy in nature.

Pamela has navigated her own search and reunion for her maternal and paternal birth families over her lifetime and has a wealth of resources to share with her fellow adoptees. She has a passion for connecting with other adoptees all over the world, so they know they aren’t alone. Although most of her connections have been made online, she’s had it on her heart for years to put her dream into action in her community and create a safe space for adult adoptees who can connect in real life.

After searching for years for her own “safe space” to share her adoptee feelings and experiences she’s found that Lexington, KY has no Adult Adoptee Support Groups. This leaves Adult Adoptees in this area to navigate their journey alone. The aloneness many adoptees feel is radiated by lack of knowledge and understanding in the professional communities such as psychiatrists, therapists, and those familiar with adoption.

It’s simple, no one knows how it feels to be adopted unless they are an adoptee themselves.

Many adoptees can experience lifelong complicated grief, loss, abandonment and rejection issues. C-PTSD is very common among adult adoptees, as well as many lifelong complications from being separated from our birth mother’s, otherwise known as the The Primal Wound.

Pamela feels it’s critical for an adoptees health and happiness to be able to share their stories and know they won’t be silenced, judged or alone.

Pamela has years of support group leadership experience being the Group Leader for Women’s Chemical Dependency for Celebrate Recovery in Lexington, KY. Her best source of experience is living as an adult adoptee and navigating her experiences for 43 years. She shares her adoption journey at Adoptee In Recovery. She’s very transparent about sharing her heart regarding her adoption experience. She’s created “How Does It Feel To Be Adopted?” and “Ask An Adoptee” to create a space for her fellow adoptees to connect, share their voices and validate one another’s experiences.

There’s power in numbers and community. Statistics show Adoptees are 4x more likely to attempt Suicide than non-adoptees and the prisons, jails, mental health facilities and treatment facilities are over represented with adoptees. Considering these alarming statistics, Pamela put Her longtime dream of creating a safe space for adoptees in her community into action.

To learn more about Pamela click Here.

Adoptees Connect – Lexington, KY will launch January 2018.

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